energy vacuum

why is it when nate gets a cold he has the same amount of energy he normally has. but when i get sick (at the same time as him) i'm totally wiped out?

i recently read a book (Raising Your Spirited Child, by Mary Kurcinka) that described the difference between an introverted child and an extroverted child. it isn't about whether your child is outgoing or not, or about making friends. the description has, specifically, to do with where your child draws their energy from. an introverted child draws their energy from being alone or with a few special people. an extraverted child draws their energy from others. the more people they are around the more energy they have. can you guess which one nate is? yes, he's a total extravert.

when we are at home, just the two of us, he's calm and reasonable and compliant and happy--ok, i will qualify that with "within the bounds of any 3 1/2 year old." but he is also sucking all of his energy from me. at this point i have limited resources of energy, so he's not getting much, but i have nothing left at the end of the day. (so i'm pretty sure why he has oodles of energy and i'm totally wiped out when we both have a cold at the same time. he's taking all of my energy!)

when both jeff and i are home or we are out somewhere surrounded by people, he gradually becomes more and more unhinged. he just can't contain the energy he's getting from everyone. and of course, that brings along some poor behavior.

one way to tell if your child is an extravert vs. an introvert is to observe how they cope with being alone. is being sent to their room a chance they long for? or is it pure torture to be apart from other people for any length of time? for nate, i might as well have asked him to jump off a cliff because he hates it. although, lately he's been getting better about being alone. we can actually ask him to go to his room and play for a little while, and he'll do it! it helps that he has the bunk bed now. it is like a jungle gym for him. LADDER! and it helps that he's simply getting older. we can also send him to his room if he's being a snot and needs time to reconsider his actions. we give him some time and then go in and talk to him about why he's in there.

sometimes, he'll send himself to his room, but that's not nearly as often. he also, by the way, tries to send us to his room when he's mad at us. but we all know that won't work, just like mama sending herself to her own room won't fly. heaven forbid i should go to my room for a time out, he follows me. part of me thinks this is him growing some independence. it is ok for him to leave me but still not ok for me to leave him. and mostly, i'm ok with that.

i'm just happy that we can use his room for reflection time and for play time. my boy is growing up. *sniff* and *yippee* at the same time.