big enough?

there is a department store that i shop in frequently in santa fe. a few weeks ago when i was there, they had mistakenly put some misses' size shirts in the women's department. i mentioned it to one of the employees working in the area while i was there. she said she would fix it.

when i was there again yesterday, those same shirts were in the same place. i am not usually the kind of person who gets offended easily, but i do find it moderately insulting and offensive for them to not correct the mistake. simply put, i don't want misses sizes in the women's department!

there are plenty of clothes that i see and think, "that could be cute on me, but they don't carry it in my size." such is life as someone who is on the larger side of the scale. instead i am quite often offered clothes that are suited more for my grandmothers (ladies who are more than 80 years old). it irks me that "big" doesn't still also mean "fashionable." as a larger person, i am repeatedly told i am unhealthy, unhappy, unworthy, lazy, ugly, and FAT by society and the media. i try to laugh it off and keep in my head that what they think doesn't matter. i am not unhappy or unhealthy. i damn well am not unworthy. and i KNOW i'm not lazy. if they think i'm ugly, screw them. and fat is just a word. i can think of other, less offensive words i prefer to use when describing myself, but fat is probably as accurate as anything else.

i am bothered by the fact that stores (department and otherwise) feel the need to marginalize those of us who happen to wear a bigger size. target has a meager plus size area to begin with. it frustrates me no end to go in looking for something only to have the women's department overrun by clearance racks from all the other sizes in the store! put the clearance items in the section they came from!

i am also just plain offended to even see a size 4 in *my* shopping space! and don't for one minute try to tell me that skinny women don't feel the same way. i can hear it now, as i've heard it in the past. the skinny girl or woman shopping with her friends, finds a plus size shirt or dress inadvertently placed in the rack with her pretty little clothes. "i can't believe anyone is this fat! gross."

it has become acceptable to mock, ridicule, minimize, marginalize, hurt, and offend big people. we are one of the last groups who are put down, systemically, on a regular basis. the going opinion is that it is easy to lose weight if only you don't eat so much and get up off your lazy butt once in a while. except when it isn't. and it is completely demoralizing to do everything "right" and have none of it *work.* if wishes were pounds lost, i'd be as skinny as i was in college.

the stupid thing is those shirts aren't going to sell where they are. women who wear a misses size don't shop in the women's department. and women who wear plus sizes aren't going to buy those shirts—not even in a "this will fit someday" delusional moment.

i took care of the issue yesterday. i moved every last one of the out-of-place shirts into the misses department. maybe when they go to put them back, they will notice the fact that they are in the wrong place. if i go back and they are there again, i'll take them up to the front and demand that it be fixed.