again?

so i said i would post about the many issues that came up toward the end of my recent pregnancy. none of them were particularly pregnancy-oriented, but the fact that i was already stressed out about the pregnancy only made them worse to deal with. well, this is one of them.

on jesper's birthday (april 28) on our way down to albuquerque to go to the aquarium with nate, i got a speeding ticket. it was only the second speeding ticket of my life. the first ticket i got a few weeks after jesper's still birth when we were taking my mom, who had stayed a bit longer than originally planned, to the airport.

my first thought when the cop pulled me over was, "is this somehow a message from jesper?" but what was he trying to say if it was a message? "slow down"? or just "i'm here"?

normally, i wouldn't have cared too much about the ticket. in fact when i got the first ticket those 5 years ago, i just kept saying "it's only money." because at the time that's what i kept telling myself. it's only money. i didn't change my driving habits. it didn't effect me in any way other than my pocketbook, despite what that officer would liked to have lectured me about. jeff saw him contemplating that very lecture and was ready to step in and explain what had recently happened, but it wasn't necessary. he gave me the ticket and backed off.

the problem this time came in the paperwork. the officer asked, "would you like to pay the penalty assessment or request a court date." to which i said, "i am in no position to decide that right now." and i wasn't. not that day. and the fact that the officer had checked the "penalty assessment" box and told me to sign the bottom would not typically have been a problem.

except that the officer had written down two different speeds on the ticket. there are a series of boxes that the officer fills in (name, address, infraction, etc). and then there is the description part of the form. in the boxes the officer wrote that i was going 63 in a 45 mph zone. in the description, he wrote that i was going 63 in a 55 mph zone. kind of a big difference. and since, when the ticket is entered into the system, they only enter the information in the boxes (not the description), it was entered that i was going 63 in a 45! (when the officer came up to the window of the car he verbally said i was going 63 in a 55, and i was in a 55 mph zone, so the 45 is not even slightly correct).

since this was only my second ticket ever, i didn't know what "penalty assessment" meant--that i was pleading guilty on the spot. had i known that--had the officer EXPLAINED that at the time--i might have chosen the court date instead. but he could afford the two seconds it required to explain that to me.

so here's the problem, how to correct a speeding ticket when it has conflicting information on it and the information that has been entered in the system is the one spot where it is wrong.

we saw the error within minutes of the stop, but too late to find the officer again. i called the SF sheriff's office to ask what to do the next day. i was told i should contest it. i was even given "instructions" as to how to go about that.

in the course of my calls and conversations, i spoke to no less than 7 different people and got no less than 7 different answers. the general consensus? everyone attached to the sheriff's office said if it is wrong, it should be fixed. everyone attached to the courts, that i could actually speak to, said, "we can't give you legal advice. but we don't do what they are telling you to do."

quite a few people never called me back. including a judge and a lawyer.

the one lawyer that did call me back refused to actually listen to the situation. then told me to go stand in line at the courthouse to speak to a judge. (i was 9 mos pregnant at the time!) except that i had been told how to get it done and "standing in line at the courthouse" wasn't it. plus i had been told that without a case pending (which mine wasn't because i had already technically pled guilty by "agreeing" to the penalty assessment with my signature) i wasn't going to be able to speak to a judge. not to mention that there was some mixed information about which court i should go to. some said magistrate court, some said district court.

ultimately, i paid the ticket because i just couldn't get a straight answer from anyone. and the one answer i got that made sense and seemed right, i could not get accomplished because of unreturned phone calls and "alternate" versions of what i should do and whether it was even a possibility to get it corrected.

i gave up. i paid the ticket the day we went to the hospital for induction. i gave it my best shot, and got no where. admittedly there was probably more i could have done, but i just couldn't afford the energy and stress and heartache that it required.

i did call my insurance carrier to ask if it would effect my rates. the first person i spoke to said, "yes, but i can't tell you how much because it would effect it until november. and i can't tell you this far in advance." stupid, but whatever. i called back again later and got someone else who said, "no, it probably won't. you have VIP coverage, and half the time they don't even check for tickets upon policy renewal. plus, the speed wasn't ridiculously high. so no big deal." we will have to wait and see whether our rates are effected come november.

interestingly, in one of my many conversations, i mentioned that the 28th was the 5th anniversary of my son's still birth. but i also said that, at the time, i didn't mention it because i don't like to "use" his birthday as a way of getting out of things. and that's what it feels like. sure, i could say it, but the truth is, i was going 63 mph in a 55 mph zone. and he got me. what difference does it make what day of the week, month or year it is? i wasn't distracted (by anything other than the preschooler in the back seat) by the day. i set my cruise control for a bit over the speed limit and he got me. but i was truthful with him when he asked what i wanted to do. i simply was not in any position or place, emotionally or mentally, to choose that day at that moment whether to pay the fine or go to court. and would it have really taken so much more from him to explain the differences and the ramifications of those differences? no, it wouldn't have, but he didn't.

want to know what i was told? a Santa Fe County Sheriff Deputy that i *should* bring it up. not that i'm using it, but that maybe the officer's response to me would have been different given the circumstances. but how do i say it without tears? especially on that day--or anywhere near it? and the tears make me feel like i am using it to get out of a ticket.

but now i know. far more than i did before.